Best Laid Plans
by mossley
Summary: When their mission goes wrong, it's up to Snake Eyes to try to keep things cool until Flint makes a daring move. Flint/Lady Jaye, Scarlett/Snake Eyes. Chapter 3 now up.
1. Chapter 1

**Best Laid Plans  
Summary**: When their mission goes wrong, it's up to Snake Eyes to try to keep things cool until Flint makes a daring move.**  
A/N:** The prompt for this story came from Rutga as part of my Christmas story giveaway. Thanks to Amykay73 and Alison Faireborn from the "Skeletons In The Closet" group for their feedback on this, as well as VR Trakowski.**  
Rating: **PG-13 for some language.**  
Disclaimer: **Of course I don't own anything related to the dang comic, cartoon, figures or whatnot.

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**Chapter 1**

Sitting inside the Tomahawk, Scarlett couldn't suppress a smile. Her last mission had gone well, and since they'd ended up near Atlanta, Hawk had given her a forty-eight hour pass to visit her family. Two days of her brothers' joking, her mother's cooking and discussions with Da had left her in a great mood that even her annoying sister hadn't been able to ruin.

To top it off, Wild Bill had just passed the word that Snake Eyes' team had gotten back from their assignment in West Germany a few minutes earlier. She was thinking of how to celebrate their reunion when she spotted his black-suited figure outside one of the Quonset huts.

Pacing.

Her grin faded immediately; Snake Eyes never, _ever_ paced.

He was already walking toward the landing pad, and she absentmindedly waved in response to Wild Bill's goodbye as she exited. Once they were out of the winds whipped up by the rotors, Snake Eyes took her elbow in his hand and pulled her off to the relative privacy of a Quonset hut.

"Lady Jaye's cover was blown," he signed, his crisp and precise movements the silent equivalent of a clipped tone.

Scarlett's initial dread was short-lived; if her friend had been hurt, he would have stated so upfront. She couldn't imagine any circumstances where he'd have left Jaye behind, and his mood didn't mesh with a friend in danger or the frustration from a failed mission. In fact, she'd never seen him quite like this and wasn't sure what to make of his current state.

"Start at the beginning," she directed, plopping down on one of the bunks.

"Our intel was correct. Cobra Commander contracted with a new munitions firm for equipment. It's a West German company based in Hanover."

"I still say that tidbit came from Destro," she said.

"Probably. The head of the firm, Johan Schmidt, hosted a party at his country estate. We knew he kept his plans there, in a secret safe room. We didn't know where it was, so we decided to plant a bug on Schmidt. Lady Jaye got into the party as one of the guests, Flint knocked out one of the waiters and took his place, and I hid in the ceiling. Dial Tone and Mainframe were outside, monitoring our mikes as they tried to figure out how to hack into the security system."

"Did he recognize her?"

"Schmidt? No. I doubt if he ever saw her. He's paranoid. None of the guests could get within twenty meters of him without a personal invitation. Flint tried to get closer with a tray of drinks, but Schmidt sent an associate to bring his drinks from a private stash."

"Weren't you able to get close enough to bug him?"

He slumped his shoulders slightly, and Scarlett recognized the gesture; he was disappointed in himself. "No. I was in a drop ceiling that hid the ductwork. Schmidt stayed on a dais at the front of the hall, and the ceiling didn't extend near it. I couldn't get a good angle."

Pulling her legs up on the bunk, Scarlett settled in for the rest of the story. His failure to bug Schmidt was, well, _bugging_ him, but it didn't explain why he was so upset. "Okay, so what happened next?"

"Lady Jaye was trying to work her way over to one of Schmidt's goons. If she couldn't get a bug on him, she was going to try to get one on someone who'd be near him. All of the sudden, a big guy grabbed her by the shoulder and spun her around."

"Cobra?"

"I wish it had been," he signed in vexation.

Scarlett raised an eyebrow as he continued at a faster pace.

"'You've really come down in the world if you're hanging out with Eurotrash, Allie,' he told her."

"Ah," she said. The jet set wasn't that big, and Lady Jaye had grown up in it. It probably was only a matter of time before someone recognized her while she was undercover at some society event. "I guess that scrubbed the mission."

"No! Jaye wasn't fazed at all. 'Keep quiet, Paulie. No one knows it's me.' She took his arm and pulled him into a corner, making up a story that a friend was convinced that her boyfriend was cheating, and Jaye said she was there to see if she could catch the guy in the act for her friend."

"And he fell for that?"

"Completely," Snake Eyes signed, stopping for a moment. "She's really good. I don't know if I could have told she was lying."

"The acting background comes in handy," Scarlett said, pausing him as she fetched them each a glass of water. He might not be bothered wearing a black body suit in a metal hut without air conditioning in the middle of the desert, but she wasn't exactly comfortable.

Her lips curled slightly when he pulled off his mask and drained his glass perfunctorily, suspecting she knew the source of his current mood. "So, how did Flint react?"

"Not as bad as I thought he was going to," he answered, giving his head a bit of a bob when she looked surprised. "I know. But we were on a mission, and he wasn't going to risk anything that would blow her cover. Flint just asked her if the 'gentleman' was bothering her, and then he made it a point to swing by their area on a regular basis to keep an eye on them."

"I'm guessing Paulie wouldn't leave her alone."

"No. Luckily, Flint missed the part where Paulie reminisced in detail about his dates with Lady Jaye." He paused significantly. "Graphic details."

"Oh, my."

"It wasn't enjoyable."

"It's a good thing Flint didn't hear that conversation."

"You'd think that would be obvious," he signed in a way that reminded her of a sigh.

Scarlett cocked her head questioningly. "Did Paulie cause any trouble?"

"Not at first, even though he was tossing back the champagne like it was water. Lady Jaye tried to shake him, but Paulie was bored. He hated Eurotrash, the weather, the food, the wine. Finally, she asked him why he was even there. He said his company designed the security systems, and he had to attend the party to demonstrate an upgrade later that evening to Schmidt."

"How long did it take her to get the information out of him?" she asked with a knowing smile.

"Less than ten minutes, and he knew everything. She played him a like a fiddle. Flint wasn't thrilled when he saw her flirting, and I thought he was going to lose it when Paulie started groping her in public."

"I can't believe he didn't!" Scarlett exclaimed. Flint was an interesting contradiction. He was one of the most accepting members of the team when it came to the female Joes, and he didn't hesitate to put them on dangerous assignments. But when it came to Lady Jaye, he was an overprotective bear if someone threatened her and a rabid bull if another male showed an interest in her.

"I didn't know who was going to be the bigger problem: Flint and his jealousy, or Lady Jaye killing him because of it," Snake Eyes signed, shaking his head in disgust. "Or if she was going to deck Paulie. She wasn't amused."

Scarlett did her best to hide her smile, but Snakes still gave her a sharp look. "At that point, Mainframe came in dressed up like a waiter and grabbed Flint to get the plans, but Flint didn't want to leave Jaye alone."

"Like she couldn't handle an obnoxious drunk!" she snorted.

Snake Eyes shook his head again. "No, Flint had every reason to be worried. Paulie was a lot taller and stronger than Jaye. She wasn't dressed for a fight; she wouldn't have been able to kick him or throw a good punch in that outfit. And that wasn't exactly a crowd that would interfere if he did try to force her. She had to play along with the creep to keep from making a scene."

"Why didn't you go with Mainframe instead?"

"I was supposed to keep a watch on everything from my vantage point. I unscrewed some of the supports in the ductwork and kept pelting Flint with washers and nuts until he got the message that I'd keep an eye on her."

"It sounds like everything was going well," she said. "All things considered."

"It was – until Tomax and Xamot showed up. Paulie was herding her in their direction, but she saw them first and tried to excuse herself. Paulie followed her into the bathroom."

"Into?"

"It seems he was interested in doing more than just remembering their dates."

"I'm going to have to talk to her about her taste in men," she said lightly, ignoring the second look he directed at her.

"I could tell Jaye was getting angry, but she kept her cool. She had to buy time for the guys to get the plans. She couldn't draw attention to herself with the twins out there, but the guy really didn't know the meaning of 'no.' Too many people saw him enter the bathroom with her, so she couldn't even knock him out and leave."

"So you just watched the show?" Scarlett asked with a smile. It had to be frustrating for him to be stuck observing while a friend was being manhandled.

"It wasn't funny!"

"No, of course it wasn't funny. Not in the least."

Snake Eyes let out a grunting sigh. "I was stuck up in the ceiling spying through a vent, trying to figure out how to make Paw-ly the Human Octopus believe he managed to break both of his hands accidentally when I finally got word from Dial Tone that the others were out. I popped out of the ceiling and signed Jaye to push him my way, and then I dropped a section of ductwork on his head. She screamed, opened the door and called for help, and we slipped out in the confusion."

"The mission was a success then?"

"We got the plans. Mainframe didn't have time to hack into the computer system, but he grabbed the pertinent data tapes and destroyed the rest. And the best part is Mainframe covered his tracks by starting a fire shorting out the security upgrade Paulie installed. He's going to look like an incompetent moron," he signed with satisfaction.

Scarlett tilted her head as she leaned back on the bunk. "Is there a reason you're acting like _…_ well, like you are?"

"The trip back," was all he signed.

Her lips twitched again. "How did Flint find out about Paulie?"

"Dial Tone recorded _everything_. He was telling Mainframe about what he missed while they were getting the plans, and he didn't realize Flint was standing right behind them when he played some of the choice bits."

"And he acted like a jealous idiot."

"She wasn't any better!"

"I guess they fought the whole way back."

"No. They _…_ sniped." He made 'yak' gestures with both his hands as he stood tensely.

"Oh," she said as she considered the significance of this development. The pair fought easily, but quickly, and they seldom stayed angry for any length of time. It was when they didn't let their respective tempers flare that sent up warning signals.

"Eventually, they both fell asleep on the flight, but they started up again when we got back to base. Flint was grumbling about taking stupid risks, and she shot back that she knew all about dealing with overbearing jackasses who only wanted sex."

He stopped to rub the back of his neck, turning to Scarlett. "He tried to cover it, but I could tell that hurt Flint. At that point, I got between them and motioned for them to split up. He just looked at me and said, 'Or what? You're going to hit me?'"

Despite her concern, Scarlett chuckled lightly. Most of the team saw Snake Eyes as a highly-trained and efficient killer, as deadly as he was mysterious; Flint considered that his job description. As far as he was concerned, Snakes was just one of the guys when off-duty, and the simple acceptance worked for the ninja. They weren't the closest of friends – their personalities were too different for that – but Flint steadfastly refused to be intimidated by Snakes.

And he was right – Snake Eyes would never hit him – but it had nothing to do with their friendship. Snakes would never allow himself to lose control like that. It was just hilarious that the one person who had the ability to most annoy Snakes was also the one person who couldn't be scared into backing off by an angry stance.

"Isn't there a ninja rule that goes, 'Don't make friends with someone you'll want to terrorize later.'?" she asked.

"It's more of a Zen kōan," he admitted after a beat. "Tell me again how they're supposed to be two of the most educated people on the team. They were acting like petulant children."

"They've probably made up by now," she said, but Snakes grabbed her arm.

"Shana, I'm not joking. They were really angry. One of them is going to go too far."

Scarlett stood and stretched slowly. She wasn't too surprised by the blowup; the tension between the pair had been growing in recent weeks, and all that was missing was an excuse to let it out. As upsetting as it must have been to witness, it was probably good that they finally vented.

Explaining that to Snakes was another matter; he wasn't exactly an expert when it came to normal relationships, let alone the fiery and quirky thing Flint and Lady Jaye had. There weren't many people on the team who he was close enough to intervene in a personal problem, choosing to let others lead their own lives, but it had to be maddening for Snakes to think he had been watching them destroy their relationship.

"Let's go see if they're over it yet," she told him, handing him his mask before lifting the trapdoor.

For all her lightness, Scarlett was a bit worried. It was fairly obvious that Flint and Lady Jaye were falling deeply in love. What wasn't as clear was the problem that was creating. They weren't even supposed to be seeing each other, and they had to keep what they had low-key. It wasn't like they could get married, or move in with one another; they were stuck in a type of relationship limbo, and the frustration was getting to them.

Looking around the Pit, it seemed like the frustration was spreading to everyone else as well. Cover Girl and Steeler stood rigidly with Jaye, who was looking through some printouts, while Flint glowered from the side.

"It could be a new turret design for the HISS tanks," Cover Girl said as she and Steeler studied a diagram.

"That's a helpful answer," Flint groused.

"Well, it's not our fault _you_ didn't grab all the files. Or that _your_ intel can't find the specs to go with the designs," Steeler shot back and immediately received two dirty looks from the bickering pair.

Scarlett had to smile; Flint and Jaye were still bitching about one another, but heaven help anyone else who joined in. She was getting ready to point that out to Snake Eyes when Breaker stepped around her.

"Excuse me, Red," he said as he trotted towards Flint.

"Hey, you're needed in the control room. You got some phone calls," he told the warrant officer. "No, seriously. You've had like a dozen in the past couple of days."

"Real original, Snakes," Flint muttered as he walked by them. "That's going to keep me distracted for all of two minutes."

"I didn't _…,_" he started to sign, giving up in disgust as he pointed at Scarlett. "This is all your fault. You had to become friends with Lady Jaye. I never would have become Flint's 'buddy' if you hadn't."

"You could always short-sheet his bed," Scarlett suggested in a stage whisper before walking over to Lady Jaye.

"Don't even start," she said tersely.

Scarlett grinned as she picked up some of the papers to help search for the data specifications. "You upset Snake Eyes. Flint does it easily enough, but I think that's the first time you've managed it. I'm not sure that's something to be proud of."

Lady Jaye let out an embarrassed huff. "I'm sorry he got stuck in the middle of that."

"Well, it didn't help that he was forced to listen to graphic details about your sex life," she drew out. Cover Girl and Steeler immediately looked up, and Jaye shot her a dirty glare. "Interesting fellow you used to date."

"I was seventeen! I only went out with him to try to upset my parents."

"Did it work?" Scarlett asked with a laugh.

"My parents? They still exchange Christmas cards with Paulie every year." Jaye was silent for a moment before letting out a sigh. "Of all the people I had to run into on an assignment, it had to be him. And Flint had to be there. It wasn't like I invited Paulie to feel me up in a room full of people."

Steeler's head shot up quickly, and Cover Girl stomped his foot, hard, before he could say anything stupid.

"Flint was worried, you know," Scarlett said, deciding that making the peace justified a little creative license. And it was probably true. "He didn't know who the guy was, just that he was all over you. He was drawing attention to you, and Cobra agents were at the party. Your cover was in danger, and there wasn't a lot he could do to help."

"I know," Jaye muttered softly, some of her anger morphing to annoyance. "But why does he have to be such an ass about it?"

"I don't know. That seems to be your type," Scarlett joked.

"He's not, not most of the time," Jaye admitted as she walked over to a console to pull up some files, and the redhead followed her. "Flint's, _…_ he can be so _…_ sweet. Then he gets all worked up over nothing."

"Like when you're being manhandled by a creep in front of a room full of Cobra sympathizers and he can't do anything to stop it?"

"I was getting the information we needed," she said, but with considerably less rancor. "It wasn't like I was having fun."

"You could have fooled Snake Eyes," Scarlett said, raising an eyebrow when her friend stared at her in shock. "He said he couldn't tell you were lying. I think you forget how well you can act."

Lady Jaye stood silently for a moment before heading back to the table. "The big knucklehead," she muttered, a trace of doubt crossing her features.

Snake Eyes approached Scarlett, nodding to the door where Flint was hesitating.

"Hey, Lady Jaye," he called out, looking a bit sheepish when she didn't make a move to join him. After a moment, he took a few steps into the room. "Look, I need to change our leave plans."

"Oh?"

Scarlett winced at the cool tone Jaye used; with one sentence, he'd managed to annoy her again. The pair had been trying to arrange a two-week vacation to go sailing. Every time they thought it was ready to go, some mission came up, and they had to rearrange their plans. They had been looking forward to the trip for a long time, and Flint's sudden change of heart didn't sound promising.

"I told you it was bad," Snake Eyes signed, but Scarlett was distracted by the warrant officer; he wasn't acting angry but _…_ nervous?

"I need to go home for a few days," Flint continued, unaware of the side conversation going on.

Jaye stopped what she was doing and turned to him cautiously. "Is anything wrong?"

Scarlett smiled to herself; if Lady Jaye was that concerned for him, then they were already on their way to making up, even if the fiery linguist wasn't ready to admit it yet.

"They'll be fine," Scarlett told Snakes, but she could tell he was frowning under his mask.

"She was furious a few minutes ago."

"That's a lifetime when these two are concerned."

Flint was now leaning against a Mauler. "No, it's good. My cousin Peter got a big promotion, but he has to relocate to the East Coast. He and his girlfriend decided to get married before he has to move. They figured it'd be easier than trying to do things long-distance."

"That makes sense, but do they have time to arrange a wedding?" Jaye asked, resuming searching through the papers.

"They decided to go with a small ceremony, nothing fancy, just some friends and family. He wants me to be his best man."

"It sounds nice," she said distractedly, nodding her head. "You should go. You haven't been home in ages."

Flint rubbed the back of his neck, shifting uneasily as he walked closer to her. "So, do you want to go with me?"

Cover Girl looked at Scarlett with a goofy grin, and the redhead was sure her smile was just as big. Snake Eyes just cocked his head in confusion.

"What?" Lady Jaye asked quietly.

"I was wondering if you wanted to get away for a few days."

She set her papers down, tilting her head as she stared at him. Scarlett noticed her confusion; she was obviously having trouble believing Flint was making such a big move.

"Hawk said you could," he added.

Lady Jaye faced her friends, a puzzled but slightly amused expression on her face. "Let me get this straight, you want me to go _home_ with you to attend your cousin's wedding?"

"No, I want you to wait around in the hotel so we can have some fun after it's over," he deadpanned.

"That sounds more like you."

"It's not going to be anything fancy, just a potluck thing, but we should be able to get out for at least one nice meal," he said, and Cover Girl and Scarlett smiled as he tried not to fidget.

When she continued to watch him questioningly, Flint dropped his shoulders and started to leave. "It's no big deal if you don't want to go."

Despite his words, it was clear that he was disappointed, and Jaye watched him sadly before swearing under her breath.

"Flint," she called out, waiting until he turned around. "I'd love to go with you."

"Yeah?"

She rolled her eyes. "Yes."

Snake Eyes turned to Scarlett, lifting his hands several times, but pausing, before he finally signed, "She was ready to kill him a minute ago."

"Uh, huh," Scarlett agreed, motioning him to be 'quiet' as she listened.

"Good. My Aunt Betty was planning to hook me up with the maid of honor if you didn't come with me," Flint said with a tired grin.

"And you weren't interested?"

"Nah," he drew out slowly. "Now if my cousin Brad had picked out my date_…_"

"Don't push your luck, Romeo," she said with a faint hint of lingering irritation.

"But she was ready to kill him," Snake Eyes continued. "And he was in a rage!"

"They got over it," Scarlett signed back.

Lady Jaye was regarding Flint carefully. "Were you serious about staying in a hotel? If so, I'll take care of that."

"Oh, I'm serious. My mother likes to believe the Sexual Revolution never happened and that I'm still a good boy."

"She doesn't know you well at all," she sighed comically. "But won't your parents be upset if you don't stay with them?"

"Well, our flight's going to be getting in awfully late. I have to finish the mission reports before we go, so we'll be lucky to get out of here by eleven Thursday night."

"What?" Lady Jaye said sharply, and Scarlett and Cover Girl faced him with disbelieving stares.

Snake Eyes simply rolled his shoulders in exasperation. "I need a scorecard."

"We leave Thursday night. We have to come back Sunday night or Monday morning. Dial Tone's checking the flights for us," Flint explained, frowning as they continued to gape at him. "It's all the time Hawk could swing for us on such short notice."

"Short notice?" Jaye exclaimed. "We're leaving _tomorrow_!"

"Don't worry, we can do something with your hair," Cover Girl assured her, crossing the room to join her.

"I don't know what I'm going to wear," Jaye replied, and the two of them rapidly began discussing and dismissing various options.

"What?" Flint asked, and Scarlett hid her grin at his exasperation. You could take the socialite out of the limelight, but you couldn't get her to part with her wardrobe. Jaye's locker and trunk were packed with clothing, and even more was stored in his room. When they started talking Chanel, he reminded them it was a casual get together, but they just scowled at him.

"What?" he asked again, turning to Snake Eyes for some masculine support.

The ninja waved his hands across his chest. "Leave me out of it!"

"You sure as hell didn't give me much time to get ready," Lady Jaye said, pulling off a glove to examine her nails. "Damn, I could use a manicure."

"We'll take care of it," Scarlett told her, privately impressed by Flint's invitation. Taking a girlfriend home to meet the parents was a major relationship milestone. It explained why his lover – a master at covert operations who could be ready for a mission in no time at all – was fretting over minor details. Even Snakes had avoided meeting her family so far.

"I _didn't_ know until a few minutes ago. No one forwarded Pete's calls to me in Europe. Why are you worried? You know you could show up in a burlap sack and you'd outclass everyone else there," Flint tried to say calmly.

Lady Jaye stopped fussing and gave him an affectionate smile. "I'd rather not test that the first time you take me home to meet your parents."

"Whatever," he chuckled. "I'll go call Pete back and let him know we're coming. See you at dinner."

Snake Eyes looked at Scarlett, scratching his head. "That can't be healthy."

"What can't?" she asked.

"Rapid mood swings."

"Oh, I don't know," she said in a syrupy voice, rubbing his arm. "He wants her to meet his family, and she's willing to go. It's a big step. It shows they're committed to one another. Don't you think it's _…_ _romantic_?"

Her lips curled as she felt the barest tremor go through his muscles.

"I need to go hit something," Snake Eyes signed before stalking off to the gym.

_TBC_

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**A/N II:** The prompt for this story was the circumstances of meeting the family for the first time. I hadn't planned on continuing this any further, but I can if there's interest.

And now it continues_..._


	2. Chapter 2

**Best Laid Plans**

**A/N:** A continuation of the story. Flint takes Lady Jaye home to meet his family, and Snake Eyes has to deal with Scarlett's use of the 'R-word.' Thanks to VR Trakowski and Amykay73 for their beta services.

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**Chapter 2**

_Deep in the bowels of the earth, in the mud far underneath Japan, lives the giant catfish Namazu, The Earthshaker. Namazu loves mischief, and thrashing his tail causes the whole earth to shake, bringing misfortune to humans who dwell on the surface. Guarding Namazu falls to the god Kashima, who controls him with his giant magical pumpkin._

_..._

Snake Eyes shifted almost imperceptibly, his head tilting to the side. Where did an ancient Japanese god get a pumpkin, magical or otherwise? Those were New World plants. Maybe it was Kadori who watched over Namazu using his raccoon dog with the giant testicles.

_No, that can't be right either._

Did the magical pumpkin have the huge testicles? That would be odd, but the story came from a culture whose pornography often featured squids and octopi, so anything was possible, he supposed.

His frown deepened as he tried to recall the legend. He hadn't heard it since his first Christmas in Japan. Storm Shadow had realized how painful a time it was for him, and he had shown up in his room after dinner. He'd skipped the saké and gone straight for the higher-alcohol shochu. They were well into the bottle before Snake Eyes had finally admitted there were times he felt misfortune singled him out. Tommy had then told him the story of Namazu, probably thinking it would cheer him up.

(Tommy's uncles, on the other hand, thought sticking the hungover pair on a swaying board in a fetid swamp while gagged would be a great way to take his mind off his troubles. It was certainly a lesson he'd never forgotten.)

However the Namazu legend went, it didn't match what he knew of ba-chi, the Japanese version of karma where you get what you deserve. Not that he could think of anything that his parents or sister had ever done that deserved their fiery death.

Again, he tried to relax his muscles and meditate. Things were settling down for the night – finally. It had been a hectic day, with practically everyone pitching in to get Flint and Lady Jaye out of the Pit. They even finished up soon enough to get the pair on a direct flight to Wichita.

_And out of my hair._

Sitting cross-legged on the mess hall floor, he flexed his arms once, forcing his muscles to slacken as he concentrated on the candle's light. Their earlier fight was immaterial; it was part of the past and unchanging. It affected his future only if he allowed it.

_Or until they get back._

He forced his breath out in a slow, controlled manner, trying to clear his mind. The legend of Namazu stayed with him, even if he couldn't recall it clearly. Snake Eyes wasn't really superstitious, no matter all the horrible things that had happened in his life. He had earned his nickname because his buddies thought he'd be bad luck to any enemies who found him, and there was some truth to that.

But if he had learned one thing since a certain outspoken, pigheaded redhead had entered his life, it was that whenever Scarlett said 'romantic', something bad happened. Cobra goons jumped her on the Staten Island Ferry; B.A.T.s crawled out of the sewer; deranged ninjas attacked their camping site – it never failed. All she had to do was utter some version of the 'R-word' and she was in mortal danger.

And she kept using it! For such an intelligent woman, she was pretty dense in that regard.

Now she wanted to take him home to meet her family, because it's 'romantic.' Oh, she hadn't come right out and said it, but he knew what she meant.

_Damn Flint! He had to go and invite Lady Jaye home._

Giving up any pretense of relaxation, he let out a disgusted grunt. He _was_ glad for his friends; he _did_ wish them well. They made a good pair, even if they managed to drive everyone else insane on occasion.

But their relationship gave Scarlett ideas, and that was never a good thing.

Despite what she thought, he wasn't clueless about relationships. He had never been what Clutch would call a "player", but he had his share of experience with women. Just because he didn't encourage Scarlett didn't mean he was unaware of her interest.

And he loved her. More than anything on Earth, he loved her. And that's why he didn't encourage her. Whenever he got close to someone, bad things always happened to them. He had lost so much already, and the thought of anything bad happening to Scarlett was more than he could bear.

Standing and letting out another grunt, he maintained a long and challenging stretch to force his mind onto another line of thought.

And he wasn't dumb when it came to Flint and Lady Jaye, either! He probably knew more about them than Scarlett. She definitely didn't know Flint was an English Lit major, or he could recite all kinds of famous works off the top of his head. No, there was a lot she didn't understand about him.

It wasn't like he intentionally spied, but there were only so many private places in the Pit, and he did have a way of blending into the background. He tended to find things out accidentally, like Mainframe's odd preferences in porn, or that Deep Six played a mean piccolo, or Leatherneck's weakness for lollipops.

Snake Eyes had also been very close to his twin sister, and Terri had been the more outgoing of the pair. She always had a cadre of friends around her, and he had learned a lot about relationships indirectly through her.

So, it had been no surprise to him when Scarlett starting arranging 'double dates' with Lady Jaye. It was one of those quirks about women – if two of them were involved with guys, they did things together. He didn't know why, but it was one of those things about females that you accepted and never talked about, like how they went to the bathroom en masse, or PMS.

And away from work, Flint and Jaye were joking and playful, even openly affectionate. It was clear to him that they loved each other, no matter how much they quibbled while on duty. More than that, it was clear how important Lady Jaye was to Flint, something he wasn't sure the warrant officer even recognized yet.

Scarlett had never understood how he got along so well with Flint. He did have some annoying tendencies, but Snake Eyes recognized a shared trait between them – a darkness on the soul, hidden as deeply as the legendary Namazu. A lifetime of tragedy had created his, and it caused him to be broody.

He didn't think Flint's went as deep, but it was there if you knew what to look for. Like Snake Eyes, he covered it with his attitude, but Flint used cockiness to the same effect. He doubted if many people actually knew anything about the warrant officer, besides the things he bragged about. He managed to create a distance from people, all the while coming across as outgoing.

Lady Jaye was the one thing that had a chance of banishing that darkness, but Flint's fears kept him from accepting her. It was enough to drive Snake Eyes insane. He wanted to shake Flint by the shoulders and tell him what an idiot he was being. It only took a split second for her to be gone forever, and he doubted Flint would ever really recover from her loss.

_I hate hypocrites._

And that was the rub. Who was he to tell Flint anything, when he wouldn't tell Scarlett what she meant to him? When he tried to deny what she meant to him? Better than anyone, he knew how quickly your life could change for the worse. He knew something horrible could happen to Scarlett at any moment; that her bravery and dedication put her in constant danger_..._

Pulling on his mask, Snake Eyes stormed out of the room. He really needed to go hit something.

* * *

"Did you have a nice nap?" Lady Jaye asked as she rubbed Flint's shoulder.

He straightened up slowly as the steward went down the aisle, helping people prepare for landing. "I was resting my eyes."

"For a thousand miles? They should be well rested."

"All the better to appreciate you," he said with a lopsided grin.

Lady Jaye gave him one of those looks he never was certain how to decipher. "Flattery's not going to do you any good tonight."

He knew she and Cover Girl had rushed to do something with her hair and stuff, and she did look gorgeous, but he'd be damned if he could tell what they had done differently.

"You do look great," Flint told her honestly. They had both opted for civvies, and although she was wearing a simple navy skirt and white blouse, it was an elegant combination with her cashmere jacket. He would never have guessed that she'd spent the last twenty-four hours working non-stop on intelligence reports, packing luggage and whatever other things she had done to get ready.

"You aren't looking so bad yourself," she admitted.

He barked out a short laugh. "You should approve. You picked out my whole wardrobe for the weekend."

She shook her head, but there was a faint hint of amusement in her expression.

Flint licked his lips nervously. He knew she was still annoyed with him, despite agreeing to go to the wedding with him. What had she called him? Oh, yeah, an overbearing jackass only interested in sex.

That had been a low blow, and he had still been stinging from it when he got word of the wedding. It was probably why he had asked Peter if he could bring a date and asked Hawk if she could join him. By the time his anger had cooled off enough to think rationally, there was no way he could _not_ ask her to attend.

It wasn't that he didn't want her to meet his family, but there was no doubt that this weekend was going to be a personal Rubicon for him. Things were going to come up; things that he'd never told her about. This weekend was going to change everything, for better or worse.

"I can get the flu, you know," she said, breaking his concentration.

Looking up, he realized the plane had already taxied to the terminal. "What?"

"If you're getting cold feet, I can stay in the hotel with the flu."

"I would never do that to you," he said hotly, embarrassed by how close her suspicions were.

For her part, Lady Jaye had a pretty good idea of what he had been thinking. She did want to meet his family, and she was thrilled that he had brought up the idea, but she didn't want him doing it to prove a point. If he wasn't comfortable, she wasn't going to push him.

"Are you sure?" was all she asked.

"Yes," he said, taking her hand. "It's _…_ it's just _…_"

She raised an eyebrow, the only outward sign of her surprise. A lack of words was not something usually associated with Flint.

"The same conversations always come up whenever I'm home, and I'm not looking forward to them," he said, adding a self-deprecating shrug. "Besides, you'd never live it down if you didn't go. Not after all the work everyone did to help you get ready."

"Me? I think it was you they wanted to get off base."

"Me? Why?"

Jaye shook her head in exasperation. "Ask Snake Eyes to explain it you."

"Nah, he's good," Flint answered, his lips twitching at her stare. "I told Duke to send a cooler with whoever comes to pick us up on Monday. I was planning on swinging by that Japanese restaurant Snakes likes on the way back to base."

"That's a start," she said, giving him a polite smile when he helped her out of the seat and gathered their carryon bags. They nodded their thanks to the crew and exited the plane. After clearing the gate area, she took his arm and pointed at the restroom. "I'll be out in a minute."

Despite his nerves, he couldn't help smiling. "You weren't afraid of getting locked in the plane's bathroom again, were you?"

"Afraid of being stuck? No. Afraid you'd tell everyone the story all weekend? Yes."

Chuckling, he set the bags down and waited patiently. Out of habit, he scanned the crowds and it didn't take him long to recognize a woman heading their way.

"Mom!" he called out when she was near, his grin infectious.

Peg Faireborn turned his way, picking up her pace once she spotted him. She laughed as her son lifted her up in a bear hug. "Dashiell!"

"What? Can't a guy be glad to see his mom?"

She wrapped her arms around his neck as she kissed his cheek. "If that's the case, you could come home more often."

"You know what my schedule's like," he said, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. Or look for an open bar. "What are you doing here?"

"Can't a mother be glad to see her son?" she answered back. "There was a robbery and shooting at one of the rental car kiosks earlier. It's thrown everything out of whack. I'll drive you to your hotel, and Brad will drop you off a car in the morning."

"You didn't have to go to the trouble."

"It's not any trouble. We were hoping you'd stay at home. Peter said you were bringing someone," she said with a smile.

Flint let go of his mother and nodded in the direction of the restrooms. "Al will be out in a minute."

"Al?"

"Yeah. An Army buddy of mine," he answered.

Her smile slipped somewhat. "Oh, Peter made it sound like you were bringing a date for the wedding."

"I did."

"You brought Al as your date," she said slowly.

"Right."

"Your Army buddy?"

"We're in the same unit."

"Oh _..._ well. That's _..._ well," she stammered for a moment before looking thoughtful. After a bit, she regarded her son closely. "Is this Al someone _..._ special?"

"Al's very special to me."

"And the two of you are happy?"

"Yeah," he answered honestly, doing his best to keep a straight face.

His mother let out a sigh. "Well, that's all that matters, I suppose."

"I'm glad you feel that way."

She reached up to pat his cheek affectionately. "I can't say I'm surprised."

Flint's smile vanished in an instant. "What?"

"Your father and I have always suspected."

"Mom!"

"Now, don't make a scene. It's not an issue."

"Wait, Mom, you _..._"

"Hush, Dashiell," she said, straightening the lapel of his leather jacket. "We'll have to find a way to explain it to your grandfather, of course. You know how he can be."

"Mom!" Flint exclaimed, waving frantically when he saw Lady Jaye exiting from the bathroom. "Come here!"

His mother turned slightly, cocked her head and looked back at her son. "This is Al?"

"Alison Hart-Burnett, Mrs. Faireborn," she introduced herself. "You have to excuse your son. He thinks he has a sense of humor."

Peg smiled at her son, a wicked gleam in her eye. "I know all about it."

"I should have known you were just joking," he laughed.

Peg gave him a curious look before addressing Lady Jaye. "Did you have a good flight?"

"Mom?"

"It was fine," the linguist answered.

"Mom?" Flint called out again as he picked up the bags. "You were joking, right?"

His mother continued to ignore him as she led Lady Jaye down the hallway. "Are you really his Army buddy?"

"That much of whatever he told you is true."

"Mom!"

_TBC_

* * *

**A/N II:** Yes, you used to be able to meet people at airport gates. The Namazu legend really exists, and Japan has a centuries old tradition of tentacle porn. Who said fanfic wasn't educational?


	3. Chapter 3

**Best Laid Plans  
A/N:** Thanks to Amykay73 and VR Trakowski for their beta services. All mistakes are mine and mine alone.

* * *

**Chapter 3**

By the time they had reached the baggage pickup area, Flint had given up trying to get a straight answer from his mother. He decided her comments were just her way of telling him she hadn't appreciated his joke. At least that was what he told himself for his own peace of mind. He had enough to worry about without that added complication.

Besides, his attention was now focused on his mother and Lady Jaye, trying to gauge how they were reacting to one another.

All the way through the airport, the two women had been making polite conversation, with his mother explaining why she was there to pick them up. Peg Faireborn knew their work was classified, so she'd kept her questions focused on trivial things. For now, she was content with being friendly, but Flint knew that would change before the weekend was over.

At some point, his mother was going to ask about their future plans, but he had no answer for her.

Whatever it was he and Jaye had, it had just sort of evolved. The trouble was, there was nowhere for it to go now. As long as they were both still in the Army, they couldn't take it any farther. He had no plans on leaving, and there was no way in hell he'd ever ask Jaye to give up her career for the sake of their relationship.

As it was, they were lucky to have a brief hookup in the Pit, and on rare occasions they got a long weekend off at the same time. If they were really lucky, they got to take a short vacation together about once a year, and even then they had to worry about exploding ninjas.

It was frustrating for him, and he had no idea how long she would be content with the arrangement.

Watching Lady Jaye with his mother, Flint felt an odd combination of feelings. He had no doubts that he was hopelessly in love with the fiery linguist, and despite his troubled mind, he smiled as he watched her.

Alison was at the top of her game. Her answers were friendly and witty, and Flint knew his mom was impressed so far. He still didn't know why his lover had been upset about the short notice. She was a natural in social situations; or at least she was good enough of an actress to appear at ease.

Of course, that was the trouble with Allie; she was excellent at acting.

At times like this, he never knew if he was seeing her true persona, or if she was hiding behind a performance. She had been fretting before they left base – not to mention that she'd been on the verge of chewing his ass out – but you'd never guess it by looking at her now.

As they waited for the baggage carousel to load, his mother finally fixed him with a sharp look. "So, how long have you two been seeing each other?" Peg asked.

"A little while."

"A little over two years," Jaye expanded.

"Dashiell!"

"What?" he asked quickly, unsure what had caused his mother's reaction.

"How many times have I talked to you in the last two years? You never said a word!"

He shrugged, trying to ignore Allie's amused expression. "Every time you asked if I was seeing someone, I told you I was."

"You never said it was the same woman."

"I never said it wasn't," he countered, prompting his mother to give him a mock glare.

"This is what passes for a Rhodes Scholar," she said with an exaggerated sigh. "Alison, I don't know how you've put up with him this long."

"He does have his moments, Mrs. Faireborn," she answered, slipping her arm into his and giving him a loving look. "And occasionally, they're good moments."

His mother gave an approving laugh. "It's Peg, Alison. Or should I call you Al?"

"It's not a nickname I care for," she said, punching Flint, hard, in the arm. "But your son thinks it's cute."

"Consider it a private term of endearment," he said, flashing her one of his crooked grins.

"Okay," she replied without hesitation, "and you're my dingbat."

Flint joined his mother in chuckling. "You've called me worse."

"I'm sure I will again," Lady Jaye answered, "but not right now."

As their luggage came around, Flint let out a grunt as he picked up her bag. "I don't know why we rented a car. You packed a Jeep in here."

"My wimpy dingbat," she said, trying to take the bag from him. "We should cancel the car rental if your cousin is dropping a car off for us tomorrow."

There really had been a shooting at a rental car kiosk, and all the other companies were chaotic as they tried to take up the slack. As they walked to the parking garage, Flint pulled out his cell phone, half disappointed no urgent calls were waiting for him. Ignoring the knowing look from Alison, he called the rental company, and the agent was more than happy to have one less customer that night.

After hoisting the last of the bags into the trunk, Flint steeled himself. "We're staying at The Regency."

As he expected, his mother raised her eyebrows, but she didn't say anything to him. "Alison, you two don't need to stay in a hotel. There's a daybed in the den, and he can sleep on the living room couch."

"But we get to sleep together at the hotel," Flint said, waggling his eyebrows.

"Don't be crude, Dashiell," Peg ordered firmly.

"No, m'm."

Lady Jaye kept a straight face, but he recognized the gleam in her eye. At least one of them was enjoying the trip so far. "It's all right, Peg. I imagine you'll be busy enough this weekend without us underfoot," she said.

"That is an understatement," she admitted as she pulled out of the parking garage.

"What's wrong, Mom?" Flint asked.

"Oh, nothing," she said. "But more people are coming to the wedding than anyone expected. I called Nana and Pops to let them know you'd be in town, and your Aunt Sharon is driving them down tomorrow night."

"That's great," he said with a grin. "You'll like Pops. Everyone says I'm just like him."

"Two of you? It is my lucky day," Lady Jaye said dryly.

"Anyway, everyone insisted they come to the wedding. And then Amy's uncle is performing the service, and he's hosting some international seminary students, so they got invited. Then they invited Uncle Carl's family in Oklahoma to be polite, and all of them are coming_…_"

Flint held up his hands. "I'm getting the picture. And you volunteered to host the reception since Aunt Betty has a smaller house. Don't worry. I'll take care of everything. What time should we get there tomorrow?"

"We're having breakfast at eight. Alison, you're more than welcome, but no one expects you to help," she said, eyeing her son disapprovingly through the rearview mirror. "You're our guest."

"It's not a problem. I'll be glad to help."

"Thanks, dear. Now don't think of bringing anything tomorrow. I'm trying to clear some space in the fridge."

Lady Jaye gave Flint a questioning look. "And you're sure we weren't supposed to bring a wedding present?"

"Pete said they don't want to deal with packing a bunch of stuff. Everyone's contributing something to the wedding instead. I told him we'd bring some drinks. We can swing by the store tomorrow and pick those up."

Again, his mother gave him a look, but he was glad she didn't say anything. As they reached the hotel, Flint decided to go for a preventive strike, pulling his mother aside as she got out of the car. "Mom, don't ask about us getting married. We can't," he told her in a low voice.

"You can't?" she asked curiously. "Is Alison married already?"

"No."

"Is there some law against it?"

"Actually, yeah," he said. "She's enlisted. I'm an officer. We're not supposed to be seeing each other."

To his surprise, his mother actually smiled brighter than she had all night. "She must be very special to you if you're taking that risk."

"It's not really a risk. Our CO doesn't care," he stammered.

"Right," Peg said. "No wedding questions from me. You have to deal with Pops."

"Oh, thanks," he chuckled as they reached Lady Jaye on the opposite side of the car.

Once inside, she stepped away from them and nodded in the direction of the desk. "I'll go check us in."

Peg waited until she had walked away. "Dashiell, if you couldn't afford a hotel room, you should have stayed at home."

Flint closed his eyes briefly before answering. "I can afford a hotel room, Mom."

His mother crossed her arms and stared down her tall son. "I certainly hope you don't expect her to pay for it. This is the most expensive hotel in town."

"_I_ don't expect her to. _She_ expects it," he said with strained patience. Seeing his mother getting ready to start again, he added quickly. "She got us a comp."

"Oh, well. That's different. Now, don't worry about the drinks. I'll help pay for those."

"I can buy a damn wedding present," Flint barked out.

"Don't swear at me!"

Her tone of voice drew an immediate, "No, m'm," from him as he tried to cool his temper. "Mom, I'm an officer. I make good money. Allie and I will supply the drinks."

"Dashiell _…_"

"God, I love you, Ma, but this is _exactly_ why I don't come home more often."

A strained silence fell over them. Flint jerked when he felt Jaye's arm slip into his. "Thank you again for the lift, Peg. If you'll excuse us, we had to work straight through last night to get the time off. We should get some sleep."

"Of course. I'll see you in the morning."

As they entered the elevator, Flint let out a long breath before looking at his lover. "Did you know about that shooting?"

"No."

"But you weren't surprised that Mom was there."

She smiled at him. "Her baby was coming home for the first time in years, and he was bringing someone with him. The shooting was a great excuse, but your mother would have found some other reason to be there to greet you."

"She likes you."

"So far," she said, bobbing her head. "I haven't lost my temper yet. We'll see what she thinks by the time we leave."

Flint grinned confidently. "I don't have any doubts."

"I hope you're right. I like her, too."

"Thanks," he told her as they got off the elevator and headed to their room. At her look, he said, "For everything. I'm glad you're here."

"I'm glad to hear that."

Flint gave the bellhop a tip after he dropped off their luggage. He eyed the mini-bar as they unpacked, tempted to grab a beer. After Jaye slipped into the bathroom, he stripped down to his underwear and sat on the edge of the bed.

Less than an hour, and he was already half-hoping to be called back to duty. He wasn't sure how he was going to make it through a long weekend without blowing up at someone.

Despite his bad mood, he had to smile when he felt the weight behind him on the mattress, and Jaye wrapped her arms loosely around him. "There's beer in there, or do you want something stronger?"

"Too tempting," he said, pressing back into her. His smiled deepened as she kissed his shoulder. He had no illusions about anything more happening. So far, she wasn't bringing up their argument they had had on the German mission, but that didn't mean she'd forgotten it. Or forgiven him.

Turning around, he expected her to be in the very practical t-shirt and shorts she wore to bed at the Pit. Instead, he was greeted by something lacy, and not a lot of it. A sort of swallowed groan escaped his lips as he took in her form. It had to be punishment for the fight; there was no way in the world he'd be able to sleep next to her while she was wearing that thing.

When her fingers cupped his chin and lifted his eyes back to her face, he was surprised by her inviting smile.

"Was your nap enough to refresh you?" she asked.

He didn't bother doing more than nod before lowering them both to the bed. He had no idea why she was feeling frisky, but he wasn't going to question it.

* * *

After a thorough workout that left the Pit with a shortage of training dummies, Snake Eyes returned to the mess hall to resume his meditation – or at least his pretense of it. The exercise hadn't been enough to get his troubles off his mind, and now he was a little sore as well.

At least he didn't have to worry about Scarlett seeking him out; she was wrapped up in some intelligence reports. As much as she meant to him, she was the last person he wanted to see right now.

Pulling off his visor and mask, he set them in plain sight and focused on relaxing. If there was any benefit to his disfigurement, it was he had all the privacy he wanted. All he had to do was take off his mask, and most people went out of their way to avoid him. Only a handful of people could bear to see his scarred face.

Unfortunately, Stalker was one of those people, and Snake Eyes eyed the Ranger as he walked over to a nearby table.

"Man, I go away on one lousy mission, and I miss all the excitement. I can't believe Flint beat you in the boyfriend department," Stalker said as he leaned against the closest table.

"Why not?" Snake Eyes asked in honest confusion.

His old friend just let out an impatient sigh. "It's hard to tease someone who takes everything so literally," he said, raising an eyebrow. "I think that's why you do it."

The ninja didn't bother to disagree.

"Okay, sure, Flint's more a people person than you are. Hell, he can hold a conversation by himself. But don't tell me he loves Jaye more than you do Red."

Snake Eyes closed his eyes as he settled back into the lotus position.

"And don't pretend you're meditating," Stalker demanded, ignoring the angry glance directed his way. "If Doc pumped your stomach with activated charcoal right now, we'd end up with a shitload of diamonds."

He gave no visible response, but he made another attempt to unclench his muscles.

"What's the deal? Don't tell me a big, bad ninja like you is afraid to go to Atlanta."

"It's none of your business."

"The hell it isn't," Stalker stated. "I look after my friends. You need all the help you can get."

"Go away," he signed with an impatient grunt.

"You know you're going to go meet her family. Why deny it?"

Recognizing that Lonzo had no intention of dropping the subject, Snake Eyes looked at him curiously. "I am?"

"You refused to bail out of a crashing helicopter to save her. You carried her out of the wreckage when you were still on fire. You broke into a Cobra stronghold to rescue her single-handedly. Hell, man, you'll do anything for her. You know you will."

"That's different."

"Yeah, you didn't have to be social then."

He glared at his friend. "Do I look like someone her family will be glad she's seeing?"

"Are you afraid she'll dump you if they disapprove?"

His scarred face twisted in what passed for a smile. "If I thought that could happen, I'd book the flight myself."

"No, you wouldn't," he said, resting his hands on the edge of the table. "You love her too much to walk away. If you didn't, you'd be back in the mountains with your wolf for company."

There was very little in the world that scared the mute ninja, but an uncomfortable feeling was settling over him. Maybe it was a premonition or maybe it was realization, but he feared Stalker was right. As much as the idea horrified him, Scarlett would likely find a way to get him to Atlanta.

The thorough training Tommy's uncles had devised to cover any circumstance was severely lacking when it came to strong-willed, beautiful redheads. Somehow, he doubted either of the elderly masters could have handled her.

What chance did he have?

Snake Eyes sat still for a long moment. "Bad things happen."

"I know, man, I was there when our patrol bought it back in 'Nam," Stalker said softly, sadness for their dead friends evident in his voice.

"I don't want anything to happen to her."

"You can't honestly believe she'll be safer if you keep your distance."

He made a grunting sound. "With my history?"

Stalker leaned forward, his voice earnest. "If you really believe you're bad luck, she's already a target. What will ignoring her do, except make her sad? You think you're going to hurt less if something does happen to her? Or are you gonna spend the rest of your life wishing you'd made her happy?"

"She can be happy without me."

Stalker held his hands out at chest level in a defensive manner. "Whoa, you tell her that. I value my life too much."

"I already have," he signed.

"Let me guess what her response was."

Tired of holding back his anger, Snake Eyes gave the floor a solid punch.

"Oh, scary. You wanna go dismember another dummy?"

"You volunteering?" he signed crisply.

Stalker just grinned in response. "Save the threats for someone who'll believe them. "

Raising his hands, Snake Eyes started to respond a few times before he finally got out, "Look at me."

After a long time, Stalker finally said softly, "So it does bother you. You hide it well."

"Of course it does!" he signed emphatically, dropping his head in embarrassment. "Scarlett escaped that crash with no injuries. That's all that should matter. But it doesn't."

"All that proves is you're human."

"She deserves better," Snake Eyes responded firmly, knowing Scarlett was never going to agree. And he could never hurt her enough to make her leave him.

"Maybe. Maybe not. The thing is she's decided on you. You think you can get her to change her mind?"

"I wish I could."

"You're afraid. I get it, man," Stalker said. "You got more reason than anyone I know to be scared. But Scarlett loves you. You love her. Nothing in the world is going to change that. Give her some credit. She's a big girl."

"I know," he signed in frustration. "Leave me alone. Please."

"Sure," Stalker said, pushing off the table and heading for the exit. He paused at the door, hesitating for just a moment before addressing his friend. "Snakes, you're my buddy, but I gotta tell you this. If you think Scarlett came out of that crash without any scars, she does deserve someone better."

Snake Eyes scowled as Stalker left the room, flexing his hands in vexation. There were days he missed being able to swear.

_TBC_


End file.
